Sharing Our Stories
With Care Experienced people being asked to share our Stories, we thought it would be helpful to share a few tips on what to do and how to respond.
Care Experienced we define as Children, Young People and Adults with experience of being placed in Children’s Social Care, in either Foster Care or a Residential Children’s Home.
Tip #1 “Check In With Yourself’ by asking yourself these questions:
Do I understand why I was placed in Care?
Have I had therapeutic support (or any other kind of support) to help me heal from the traumatic experiences I went through before being placed in Care and/or any traumatic experiences whilst in Care?
Why do I want to share my Story?
Using these questions to check in with yourself, will help you to see if you are ready to be open and transparent about your Care Experience Journey, in a healthy, productive and positive way, with the intention of inspiring hope in those who are placed in Children’s Social Care and providing solutions to those who work in the Sector.
Tip #2 Make sure you know exactly who is asking you to share your Story, what they are asking you to share, for what purpose and in what format
Here are a few examples:
Who is asking? A TV Channel
The Purpose? They are covering a story on the Care Experience to shine a light on certain aspects of the Care System.
What format? A ‘live’ Interview for the TV Channel
Who is asking? A Researcher
The Purpose? They want to gain an understanding of whether Children’s Social Care System have had a negative or positive impact on our lives.
What format? A Questionnaire (Survey)
Who is asking? Your Local Authority (Corporate Parent)
The Purpose? They want to see how they can make the overall Care Experience better, for the next generation.
What format? In person feedback
You may also be asked by another Care Experienced Person, a Charity, a Journalist, an Author or a Film Maker; and so whoever is doing the asking, remember to make sure that you are clear on what they are asking you to share and why, as this will help you to see if your Story (or aspects of your Story) relate to the desired purpose.
Sophia Alexandra Hall who is a Journalist and care experienced person, has created a Toolkit filled with advice for journalists on how they can positively empower and engage care experienced interviewees in the UK. It also includes advice for care experienced people, on how to protect themselves and their life stories when working with the media. The Toolkit is free and available to download here.
Tip #3 Ask if you will be Therapeutically supported, as you engage in the process of Sharing Your Story
This is key, because as you share your Story, you will be remembering and reliving your experiences, that may trigger and open up memories of painful experiences you have tried to forget, which may have an impact your emotional wellbeing and/or your mental health, after you have shared; and so if the one who is asking you to share your Story is unable to provide Therapeutic support or help you access Therapeutic support, please make sure you do all that you can to have this in place.
Tip #4 Will this be a Paid opportunity?
Consider this, your Story will be adding value in the form of insight and expertise, to ultimately help those in the Children’s Social Care Sector improve their Systems, Service and Practice. Your Story will help to raise awareness of the Care System and your Story will resonate and bring hope to generations of people with Care Experience. With that in mind, an offer of payment in the form of an agreed sum of money or royalties (if you share your Story in a Book) or an offer of a tangible incentive, will also add value to you and help you.
Now there will be times when you may want to share your Story without receiving any form of payment, and if that is the case please don’t let those times stop you from plucking up the courage to ask for payment at other times.
Yes or No
In the light of these Tips, please know that it’s ok to say ‘No’ and positively decline from engaging in sharing your Story, as this may be as a result of how you felt after you ‘Checked In With Yourself’ or because you intuitively sensed that this opportunity is not right for you.
With that said, you may say ‘Yes’ and engage with sharing. As you engage, please be mindful not to overshare, as you may not get the chance to edit out or take back what you have shared.
And as you engage, please don’t fall into the trap of comparing your Story or yourself with other Care Experienced People and their Story, because irrespective of how many Foster Carers or Social Workers we did or didn’t have, or how many Children’s Homes we lived in, or how many Schools we attended, and irrespective of how and why we entered the Care System, we ALL have a Care Experienced Chapter in our lives, that counts and is of value.
Have you found these Tips helpful? Are there any other Tips you would add? Let us know in the comments or send us an email.